As some of you know, I’ve never thought that Marianne Dashwood of “Sense and Sensibility” deserved Colonel Brandon, or was a good match for him. Now, after years of complaining, I’m finally going to do something about it! (With your help, of course.)
We are going to find a new woman for Colonel Brandon! Who gets your vote?
How about Anne Elliot? She’s smart, she’s kind, and she isn’t a teenager. She doesn’t fall in love with cads. On the other hand, both she and Brandon are a bit brooding. Are they too much alike? Would their marriage be a depression made in heaven?
Jane Bennet is much more mature than Marianne, but just as blonde and pretty. And she doesn’t fall in love with cads either. She might not be up to his intellectual weight, though. Would Brandon soon tire of Jane’s sweet nothings? (Pretty much anything she says is a sweet nothing, after all.)
Elizabeth Bennet is smart, and she and Brandon could have invigorating discussions. Or is she too sharp for him? Does he fall in love with teenagers because he’s secretly insecure? Elizabeth might not have the flattering tongue he needs… Or is he confident in himself, and man enough for our Lizzy?
The Fanny Dashwood in the dreadful movie of “Mansfield Park” (which doesn’t deserve to be called a Jane Austen movie, but that rant’s for another time) definitely deserved a better fellow than Edmund! He’s a wimp, and falls in love with female cads! But is this Fanny too contaminated by Patricia Rozema’s movie to truly satisfy Brandon? How about the Fanny of Austen’s book? Would Brandon bring her out of her shell? She’s very young, but perhaps she needs a better defender than indecisive Edmund! And we know Brandon likes teenagers… π Then again, wouldn’t he be a much better grandfather to Jane Austen’s Fanny?
How about Jane Fairfax? Surely she can do better than that semi-cad, Frank Churchill! She’s quiet, just like Brandon — but is that a good thing or a bad thing? Would they both just sit around all day like lumps? Is she too perfect for him? Surely any woman who’s too perfect for Mr. Knightley would be too perfect for our Colonel Brandon! After all, anyone who falls for Marianne is clearly not looking for a flawless woman. (It could be argued he’s not looking for a woman at all, but that’s another rant for another time.)
Some of you seem to think that Duck-face Miss Bingley can be saved. Who better to do it than Colonel Brandon! Would true love transform her shallow desperation into warm maturity? Or would he end up a grump behind his newspaper like Hugh Laurie’s character?
Or, of course, you may choose to match Brandon up with Marianne if you wish, or with someone not listed here!
Who do you think Colonel Brandon should marry?
Cara
Cara King — www.caraking.com
MY LADY GAMESTER — Holt Medallion Finalist!
Ah, someone not listed here! So–if I were unmarried, and born into 19th century fiction instead of 20th century Boston, I’d say ME! I love him–“Give me an occupation” is one of the sexiest lines ever delivered.
Unless, Cara, we’d have to duke it out? And don’t challenge me to a game of cards, either!
No, I won’t fight you for him, Megan! He is gorgeous, true — but I will satisfy myself with Jeremy Northam’s Knightley, and you can have Alan Rickman. Um, I mean Colonel Brandon. π
Did I ever mention that I missed seeing Alan Rickman play Valmont in Les Liaisons on the London stage by one week??? Argh!
Cara
(who did however see Ralph Fiennes as Hamlet, which is some consolation) π
I’ve heard people say it the other way round–that he is too old and boring for her. As a teenager, I thought so, too. Later I saw it Cara’s way, but now that I’ve gotten older and am raising little drama queens of my own, I’m more understanding. Marianne is young and foolish, but she does learn a painful lesson. By the end I feel she is worthy of Colonel Brandon.
Though not more so than Megan.
Now to important matters. Does that mean I get to pick either Matthew McFadyen or Colin Firth, um, Mr. Darcy? Or do I have to challenge the rest of the Riskies for them?
Elena, I think Amanda might fight you for Matthew. And maybe Diane too. π And didn’t someone claim Colin once upon a time?
Doesn’t anybody want Hugh Grant?? π
Cara
Okay, so if we’re opening the floor to all of the Austen film heroes, I am totally going for Matthew MacFadyen. Or Colin Firth.
I do not want Hugh Grant unless he’s being a cad. I like his caddish self.
And Elena, I used to feel the same way, and now I feel like Cara does–that Marianne doesn’t deserve a guy like him. So much repressed passion. Mmm.
I WILL fight for Matthew! He’s mine, mine, mine. (There, that was my own drama queen moment for the day) π
I agree with Elena that at the end Marianne had learned her lesson and grown up quite a bit, therefore making her a bit more worthy of Col. Brandon.
(I also got to see Ralph in “Hamlet”!!! Years ago, but I loved it)
Okay. It will be very hard on dear Matthew, but I’ll give him up…on one condition. I get Gerard Butler! We can dress Gerry in a Regency coat, waistcoat, and pantaloons, if you insist. But I get to dress him!
I think Col Brandon needs Marianne’s passion and she needs his steadiness. They are perfect for each other!
Diane
It’s obvious who Colonel Brandon should marry: Mrs. Dashwood. He probably could persuade Marianne to perch on his knee and prattle girlishly, while the proud Mama looks on, beaming.
Alternatively, he could form a bachelor establishment with Mr. Woodhouse, and the two of them could compare notes on flannel waistcoats, unencumbered by the company of troublesome females. And I’m sure he’d always be welcome as a teacher of poetry at the boarding school up the road, where pupils could perch on his knee, etc. etc.
Janet
Um, I’m not a Risky, but if no one else is dead set on him I’ll take Hugh Grant, please.
Though remember Cara, that I saw Jeremy Northam on stage!!! You did call him first however…
Mwahhhhhahahahahahahahah! (That’s an evil laugh in case anyone wonders).
I’m so with you on the Mansfield Park film, Cara. *shudders*
I’m with Elena and Amanda on the Col. Brandon thing. I may not understand why, but he wants Marianne and he certianly works hard enough to win her. I’d hate to see him disappointed…
Agreed, Marianne is too young for him! And I’ll make the supreme sacrifice and take Colin Firth off your hands with or without the waistcoat but definately strolling up the hill from a pond!
I’d forgotten you’d seen Jeremy Northam on stage, Mandacoll! (Though I did recall that someone else had claimed my Jeremy…) Hmm… Maybe we can share him? Then I could have Ciaran Hinds half-time. Not the current Ciaran Hinds, but the Wentworth Ciaran Hinds, of course! π
BTW, Santa, I think you may have to fight Elena for Colin Firth. Unless she’s busy fighting Amanda for Matthew McFadyen. And to be honest, I wouldn’t advise her to do that — I suspect Amanda will fight dirty to win her Matthew…
You know, they need to make more Jane Austen movies! There aren’t enough guys to go around!
Or maybe….maybe….I could satisfy myself with Ralph Fiennes, and leave Jeremy to Mandacoll…. Okay, no, I couldn’t. Can we split them all in thirds? Or clone them?
(BTW, Janet, I like your idea about Mrs. Dashwood….)
Cara
I’m really limited on who I know from the possibilities, so I’d go with Jane Fairfax. Why, because she really can do much better than Mr. Collins!
And there is yet another person here who you guys have to fight for over Colin Firth. I mean Mr. Darcy. π But if Gerard Butler shows up as the Phantom, he’s mine! Bu then if Sean Connery shows up. . . choices, choices. . . LOL π
Lois
Santa, you can’t have Colin, he’s mine! Shall it be swords or pistols?
Hmm…. OK, as my shooting and fencing skills are pretty much nonexistent, I will graciously give up Colin and take Sean Bean instead.
Elena π
Cara, good idea. Let’s rotate between Jeremy and Ciaran Hind’s Captain Wentworth…I am jealous of your having seen Ralph’s Hamlet…bet that was great…
I am jealous of your having seen Ralph’s Hamlet
Okay, Mandacoll, doesn’t that sound like you’re using some sort of euphemism??? π
Yes, it was very nice. π
One of the perks of living in London for a few years was getting to see some great actors on stage — Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Ian McKellan, Vanessa Redgrave, Felicity Kendall, Eileen Atkins… (We even saw Jennifer Ehle, but as it was before Pride & Prejudice, we’d never heard of her before!) Ah, the London theatre scene is so great!!! (Cara sighs for the days when she was young and lucky and a few pounds lighter…before all those pies and mash and sticky puddings…)
Cara
Okay, Diane, you can have Gerard since I get Mathew! (she said graciously. And if I get Orlando, too…) Do you think we ought to let Elena have Sean Bean all to herself, though? π
Amanda, I’d have to say swords only because I know how to wield a pretty mean mezzaluna but then that would mean dirks at dawn!
I can’t let you have Sean Bean either but I may trade him for a Dougray Scott. He hasn’t been in any Austin films but I’d venture to say he’d look fetching in inexpressibles!
Do I duel Elena as well? I’d have to consult my calander and seconds. Plus does anyone know if that field in Hyde Park still exists. There’s a Hyde Park near me but I think they’d frown upon duels. We could meet on the grounds of the Vanderbuilt Mansion in the Italian gardens….
Oh dear, I had better sign up for some fencing lessons! Otherwise I will be left with Mr. Collins.
LOL, Cara…Ralph’s Hamlet!!! Hahaha. Seeing Jeremy’s Love’s Labors Lost just doesn’t have the same ring to it…
Santa, Elena, Amanda, I would be happy to stand as one of your virtual seconds. But only one…
Don’t I have to contact a physician or something? Will WebMD do?