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Monthly Archives: June 2007

So, last weekend I had a Major Catastrophe in my life. Drama, tears, threats, wailing, the whole Marianne Dashwood-esque thing. I innocently went in for a haircut on Saturday afternoon, and thought it might be fun to get some “light, summery highlights.” To look pretty for RWA and all. Alas, at this salon it seems “light highlights” translates to “make my whole head look like a marigold.” Yes, my hair was orange, and only hours before my second date with Workplace Sweetie! My mother’s colorist (who I called, sobbing, when I got home) said she could probably fix it, but couldn’t fit me in until Friday. In the meantime, I would just have to wander around quoting mournful poems in the rain in true Marianne fashion–and hope that the water would somehow wash away the orange. (Luckily we have had a LOT of rain here lately). I also made hats and scarves my friends.

I’ve always kind of liked my hair. It’s thick and shiny, a nice, dark chocolate color, and seldom lets me down (unlike, say, my stubbornly unflat abdomen). I was surprised to find how much I take it for granted. And that so much of my self-identity seems tied up in being a brunette. Audrey Hepburn, Coco Chanel, Anna Pavlova, Jackie O., Ingres’ Princesse de Broglie–all women I would like to look like (not to mention Rachel Weisz and Penelope Cruz). All brunettes.

I started thinking about romance novel heroines, those girls who have flowing curls on the covers and hair like ‘spun moonlight’ in the text (even though in reality they probably seldom washed it, and there were no deep conditioners and frizz-release gels). How often do they fall into categories of ‘intellectual’ brunettes, ‘angelic’ blondes, ‘fiery’ redheads? In my own writing I try hard not to fall into these types–Rosalind, the heroine of my Regency Rules of Love, is a redhead, but she’s very proper and, well, rule-bound. Marguerite, the French assassin from my recently finished manuscript, is blonde, but not angelic. But very often I found that my heroines are studious girls with dark locks. Hmmm. Wonder where THAT comes from?

I’m reminded of Anne of Green Gables, and how her hair turned green and had to be cut off after a run-in with some cheap hair dye. I feel for Anne, I really do. You just can’t escape from your hair-color destiny. I’m also reminded of Marie Antoinette and her poufs, those super-elaborate hairdos built on scaffoldings of wire, cloth, gauze, horsehair, fake hair, and the woman’s own hair (if it hadn’t all fallen out after such abuse). It was all teased high off the forehead, doused with powder, and installed with miniature still-lifes, usually to express a sentiment (pouf au sentiment) or commemorate an event (pouf a la circonstance). What could my orange hair commemorate? Solidarity with the grapefruit juice industry? (I do like grapefruit juice, but never much wanted to look like it). A desire to match my new bottle of Chanel Heatwave nail polish? I just don’t know.

Have you ever had a hair disaster of your own? Are there any novel heroines or celebrities whose hair you covet? (I’ve always really liked Gwyneth Paltrow’s, but I’ve learned my hard lesson about trying to go blonde in any way!)

Oh, and the date went great, even though I had to tie a silk scarf over my hair that made me look vaguely like an extra from Pirates of the Caribbean
And yesterday my mom’s colorist gave me back my dark hair! Not exactly like my own color (it’s quite a bit redder), and it’s dried out from all the abuse, but much, much better. You won’t have to look for my orange head floating around in Dallas.

My mom is from Minnesota, a fact she deplores since she hates cold weather more than I hate lima beans. But her youngest brother still lives here, so my son and I are out visiting and the son is taking sailing lessons.

When my grandparents came out here in 1945, they bought a house in Minnetonka Beach, which is on Lake Minnetonka. Now, Minnetonka Beach is a chi-chi community, with huge mansions, boats, fancy lifestyles and tons of wealth dotting the lakeside (there are Pillsburys, real Pillsburys, living and baking here, for example. My grandmother once cooked a Duncan Hines cake when she had them over to dinner many years ago. Oops).

Last Sunday, my relatives took us to a party celebrating a high school graduation. The patriarch is the CEO if a Fortune 500 company, and his annual salary for the past three years has been in the double digit millions. So the house? It was BREATH-TAKING. The family had built it themselves on five acres of land, and had bought a neighboring six acres so no-one could come in and “spoil the view.”

It felt really weird to be around that much money. And I thought the feelings of inadequacy and envy might be similar to what our poor churchmice heroes and heroines might feel when they entered a ton party for the first time. How incredibly overwhelming!

Just think if you had barely ever left your small village, but somehow you and your family has the connections and the funding to sponsor a come-out. And you end up at Carlton House, having a five-hour meal, or meeting the Prince, or just wandering through the rooms stuffed with precious artwork.

It would take a strong person to handle seeing that much opulent display of wealth without feeling some sort of inadequacy (side note: I was not that strong. I felt totally intimidated). What would a hero or heroine do in response? Have you ever had that kind of experience?

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I’m borrowing the artwork from Salon‘s article yesterday, I Dream of Darcy, because I think it illustrates what was both right and wrong about Rebecca Traister’s somewhat sniffy take on the infiltration of Jane Austen into pop culture.

And yes, she mentions The Rules of Gentility in a list of Austen-inspired books that are coming out this summer to coincide with the release of the movie Becoming Jane. (Hey, a mention is a mention is a mention–I can take a bit of snottiness.) And besides, mine isn’t a knock-off–I have a couple of blatant quotes from Austen, and then I left her alone lest an acidic, ladylike thunderbolt should strike me.

As Ms. Traister points out, there have been waves of Austenmania, the last one of which, in 1995, was inspired by the A&E Pride & Prejudice and the lovely and talented Colin Firth. I can think of worse things to happen in movieland. Do Austen movies or series, however carefully crafted, or Austen knock-offs in the form of fantasies about Firth–oops, Darcy–mean that a new generation of readers will flock to read Austen? Or if they flock, will they stay and make it through Mansfield Park? Interestingly enough, the last decade, despite Firth’s wet shirt, saw the decline and end of the two traditional Regency lines (Signet and Zebra).

But Austen’s work endures–her novels have never been out of print for almost two centuries. My feeling is she’s a big enough girl to take any sort of snarky imitation, uppity young movie director’s vision, or scriptwriter’s short cut.

Traister uses one marvelous quote from a letter Austen wrote advising her niece about marriage:

“… there are such beings in the World perhaps, one in a Thousand, as the Creature You and I should think perfection. Where Grace & Spirit are united to Worth, where the Manners are equal to the Heart & Understanding, but such a person may not come in your way, or, if he does, he may not be the eldest son of a Man of Fortune, the Brother of your particular friend & belonging to your own Country.”

Austen was very much aware of the divide between fantasy and reality–it’s a theme throughout her novels: Marianne vs. Elinor, the Gothic sensibility vs. real life, and the pragmatic attitude of most of the women in her novels toward love and marriage. But for reasons that are unclear to me, Traister thinks modern women–or should that be overt readers of romance and/or chicklit?–can’t differentiate between fantasy and reality, hence the huge supply/demand of Austen-related books and movies. And the picture? Well, she has something wrong with her spine, but a most un-Regency-like sash at waist level, and as for that water bottle … someone wrote in to Salon asking if it was a … well, never mind.

Anway, read the article. Let us know what you think and whether you really expect Colin Firth to emerge dripping from a nearby pond.

Want to win a copy of The Rules of Gentility? Pam Rosenthal is offering copies as prizes in her latest contest, www.pamrosenthal.com.

And sign up for the Riskies newsletter at riskies@yahoo.com for the latest wet Firth sightings.

Last Sunday at our UU church, the theme was the spiritual journeys in The Wizard of Oz. Early in the service we reenacted the story, accompanied by a wild interpretation of the film’s music by Bobby McFerrin. All in about 8 minutes if you can imagine that! Wacky and fun.

There’s a lot any storyteller can learn from this story. It’s been used as an example in Debra Dixon’s workshops on Goal, Motivation and Conflict and analysed in terms of the Hero’s Journey.

Readers and/or viewers love it, for the fun but also the universal themes: misfits trying to find their place, the common insecurities of feeling one is not smart/kind/brave enough, coming of age, seeking something and being made to face our worst fears.

My family and I aren’t purists about our own Oz obsession–we like ruby slippers better than the silver shoes, for instance–but we’ve also read all the Oz books by L. Frank Baum and a bunch of the other Royal Historians of Oz. We’ve attended Oz events and in the past I’ve stayed up late to make a Princess Ozma of Oz costume for Halloween (not easily found at Target). 🙂 Besides the classic film, we also love “Return to Oz” with Fairuza Balk starring as Dorothy in a tale based on elements from The Marvelous Land of Oz and Ozma of Oz.

We love Oz not just for the characters but because it’s a world of its own, like Middle Earth, Star Trek or Regency England. Regency fans often love other shared worlds so now I’m wondering how many Oz fans we have out there. Unless you live with some remote tribe somewhere (with Internet access if you’re reading this!) you’ve seen the movie, but have you read any of the books? What do you think of the movie adaptations? Have you ever attended an Oz event or dressed up as an Oz character?

Which Oz character do you relate to most closely? I’ve always felt an affinity to the Cowardly Lion myself. 🙂

Which other shared worlds do you enjoy visiting and what makes you love them?

Elena, the rather large Munchkin in the purple hat
www.elenagreene.com

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Right now, I’m in France — the perfect time to share with you some 18th century stereotypes about different European nationalities!

Excerpted from THE ROAD TO KNOWLEDGE: Or, Young Man & Woman’s Best Friend, by George Stapleton, published in London in 1797.

On THE FRENCH:

With respect to the PEOPLE of France, they are very lively and active, with a great share of wit, and a natural disposition and aptitude for all bodily exercises: they are, however, of a most restless disposition, and appear more fond of war than any other people.

As to treaties, covenants, &c. they pay very little regard to them. They violate a treaty, however solemn, with as little ceremony as they sit down to dinner.

Politeness is a characteristic with them; but this is often overdone; and that wit and sprightliness, otherwise so engaging, seems to be not purely natural.

In the mean time, amidst their excessive fondness for wit, the understanding is neglected, as of little or not consequence; the effect of which is, that they often mistake the shadow for the substance, and seek merit in external appearances, and things of no affinity with it.

As they vainly imagine no nation can come in competition with them for wit, so they arrogate to themselves the like superiority in qualities really praiseworthy, and especially military courage. Their natural levity subjects them in their own deportment, and particularly in their cloathing, to the tyranny of fashion, which is ever varying, and yet is submitted to by almost every European nation except the Spaniards.

On THE SWISS:

The native of Switzerland are very industrious, and no part of the world produces better soldiers.

On ROMANS:

The inhabitants [of Rome] possess many good qualities, and many bad ones: they are polite, prudent, industrious, and ingenious; but they are luxurious, effeminate, and addicted too much to pleasure.

And remember — the first Tuesday of the month is the Jane Austen Movie Club! (Next week’s movie: the 1995 version of PERSUASION. Please join us!)

Cara
Cara King, luxurious, effeminate, and full of levity

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