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Author Archives: Amanda McCabe/Laurel McKee

About Amanda McCabe/Laurel McKee

Writer (as Amanda McCabe, Laurel McKee, Amanda Carmack), history geek, yoga enthusiast, pet owner!

Last week, I went to a follow-up appointment with the surgeon, and one of the things I had to do was fill out a post-op questionnaire all about how I’m doing since I came home. One of the questions asked if the patient was suffering feelings of depression, and I realized something very important–I’ve actually been feeling very happy, eager to go out and have fun even. I guess a near-brush with disaster will do that, or maybe it’s a compensation for missing out on RWA, lol. But it led me to do something I always said I would never, ever do–sing karaoke. It was a friend’s birthday party Saturday, and well, one thing led to another, and next thing I knew I was singing “California Gurls.” Keep in mind that I have a terrible singing voice and am very sensitive about it, but when it was all over I realized it was actually kinda fun. Liberating.

So now I am on a “Make The Most Of Life” campaign. Every week I am going to try something new, just to help me remember life should be an adventure. I will post what I find to do (as long as it’s PG-rated…)

And when I was looking for topics for today’s post I found out that July 12 is an anniversary for one of my very favorite Bold Women in history–Dolley Madison, First Lady of the US from 1809 to 1817, who died on that day in 1849 after a long and very eventful life. She seemed appropriate to talk about today. I first “met” Dolley when we got an assignment to do a report on a figure in American history in the 5th grade. I found a book about her in the school library and loved her immediately! She was all the things I wished I could be.

She was born Dolley Payne into the Quaker Payne family on May 20, 1768, one of 8 children, and grew up in Virginia until 1783 when her family sold the family slaves and moved them to Philadelphia, where his business promptly failed and he died in 1792, leaving Dolley’s mother to run a boarding house to take care of the family. She married lawyer John Todd in 1790 and had two sons with him, but he and their younger child died in a yellow fever epidemic only 3 years later. In May 1794 she met James Madison, who had been admiring her from a distance, through their mutual friend Aaron Burr. At first glance they were a strange couple. James was 17 years her senior, a longtime bachelor, short and quiet, while Dolley was tall, buxom, and supremely outgoing, but they fell in love and were married in September of that year. She was then cast out of the Quaker church, which freed her to pursue her love of the latest fashions (especially elaborate hats and turbans!)

In 1797, James retired from the House of Representatives and took Dolley and her son to live at his home at Montpelier in Virginia, where they planned to live a quiet, private life. Fate intervened when Thomas Jefferson asked James to be his Secretary of State in 1801 and the family moved to the brand-new capital Washington DC. James became the 4th president in 1809, and Dolley really came into her own. She was a great First Lady, known for being very fashionable and giving fabulous parties. She redecorated the White House to reflect its stature, and was also very intelligent, shrewd, and charming, renowned for her ability to bring quarreling factions together and smooth quarrels at a very hotheaded time. (Too bad we don’t have her around now…)

Her most famous moment came during the War of 1812, as the British Army converged on DC and the populace fled. Alone at the White House, Dolley packed up vital papers and insisted on making sure the famous Gilbert Stuart portrait of George Washington was saved before she left for safety herself. As she later wrote to her sister, “Our kind friend Mr. Carroll has come to hasten my departure, and in a very bad humor with me, because I insist on waiting until the large picture of General Washington is secured, and it requires to be unscrewed from the wall. The process was found too tedious for these perilous moments; I have ordered the frame to be broken and the canvas taken out….. It is done, and the precious portrait placed in the hands of two gentlemen from New York for safe keeping. On handing the canvas to the gentlemen in question, Messrs. Barker and Depeyster, Mr. Sioussat cautioned them against rolling it up, saying that it would destroy the portrait. He was moved to this because Mr. Barker started to roll it up for greater convenience for carrying.”

And another account of her perilous journey, “The friends with Mrs. Madison hurried her away (her carriage being previously ready), and she, with many other families, retreated with the fleeing army. In Georgetown they perceived some men before them carrying off the picture of General Washington (the large one by Stewart), which with the plate was all that was saved out of the President’s house. Mrs. Madison lost all her own property. Mrs. Madison slept that night in the encampment, a guard being placed round her tent; the next day she crossed into Virginia, where she remained until Sunday, when she returned to meet her husband.”

She was a beloved figure for the rest of her husband’s presidency, and indeed for the rest of her life. James died in 1836 after 42 years of marriage, and even though Dolley was plagued by worries over her n’er-do-well son for the rest of her life, she lived in DC and entertained and enjoyed life until her own death in 1849.

So, what have I been doing this week (besides missing all the fun at RWA!)?? I have been:

1) Watching far too much TV. Until the last couple of days, it was hard to concentrate on books, so I was mostly reading fashion magazines and watching copious amounts of television. DVDs of every Austen and Bronte adaptation I have, North and South (for the 161st time), Top Gear, True Blood, and marathons of Say Yes to the Dress and My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding (how did I miss this show before??? Those dresses are a whole new dimension of crazy), until I started yelling at the people on the screen and had to turn it off.

2) Feeling much better, almost human again. I went to Sunday brunch and a friend’s 4th of July pool party (though no bikinis for me the rest of this summer!), and had a whole new appreciation for things like that. Life is good.

3) Drinking chocolate milkshakes, which are the only thing that really tasted good until recently and are probably a big part of my new-found appreciation for the world! Milkshakes are awesome.

4) Being really, really glad I didn’t need surgery in the eighteenth century, when things wouldn’t have gone quite so well. I have a reproduction of a 1712 pamphlet titled “Treatise of the Operations of Surgery” and let me tell you, that is some scary stuff. Their advice for painkillers during surgery is basically a stiff drink and bite down on a piece of wood. And with no x-rays and CT scans their best guess for when and where to perform a surgery was to rely on the weather. For instance:

“A favorable season for an operation is either Spring or Autumn. In the Spring, the blood is revived with greater heat whilst in the Autumn blood is cooler. In the Winter the cold…hardens transpiration and the blood has not the vivacity required to animate our bodies.”

Good to know. There is also this quite terrifying site with photos of old surgical tools, if you’re curious….

All told, I’m glad I got to go to a modern operating room with a nice painkiller drip afterward.

What have you been doing this week?


Thanks so, so much to everyone for your good wishes after my emergency surgery last week! It was scary, but I’m now on the road to recovery and looking forward to stories our of RWA Nationals this week. Knowing I have some great friends has made things so much easier. Stay tuned next week when I can (hopefully!) stay on the computer longer than 5 minutes and will have a proper post…

Happy Tuesday, everyone! Like Diane, I am “between engagements” (I know what’s coming up next–after RWA, which is two weeks away, eek!). So, what am I doing with all this time? I am deciding what to pack for RWA, trying to lose a couple more pounds before RWA (in the quest for which I’ve been doing crazy things like kickboxing and spin classes), and just generally getting excited about seeing everyone at RWA. I’ve been supervising my little ballet class in last weekend’s recital (everyone performed beautifully!), and I’ve been getting caught up on some reading. (Just finished a terrific book by Jehanne Wake called Sisters of Fortune: America’s Caton Sisters At Home and Abroad about a set of beautiful, wealthy sisters from Maryland who took Regency London by storm).

I’ve also been doing some prelim work for the next couple of books (that stuff which I call Important Research and others–like my mother–might call procrastination). I love to make soundtracks for stories, music that seems to suit the mood of a certain character or scene. It can be music of the period (like lute music for an Elizabethan story) but not always. Sometimes it’s something totally off-the-wall (sort of in the style of Sofia Coppola’s Marie Antoinette). Today I am thinking of music for love scenes. These can be the trickiest scenes to set to music sometimes, because it all depends on the mood. It can be anything from Bolero, instrumental jazz like Miles Davis’s So What, or Rihanna’s S and M. I asked some of my writing friends around here what they would suggest–some people had funny stuff (Katy Perry’s Peacock), some had ideas I might steal (like Crash Into Me by the Dave Matthews Band).

My number one stand-by song for any love scene is this, Next Girl by The Black Keys:

And this is Billboard’s Top 50 Sexy Songs….

What are your favorite love scene songs? Do you put soundtracks to your books?

(And if you’re in a serious-minded historical mood today, it’s the anniversary of the Battle of Friedland, which you can read about here…)

(Also, it’s International Steampunk Day!)

Happy Tuesday, everyone! What have I been doing this week, since I am free of deadlines (free, I tell you!), at least for the moment? Well, I have been sitting around watching season 3 DVDs of True Blood, trying out some kickboxing classes (and trying to figure out how to write an awesome kickboxing Regency duchess heroine–I’m pretty sure that won’t work out though), starting to get ready for RWA (less than three weeks away now, ack! At least I did remember to take my gown to the tailor), going to the movies, and getting caught up on reading. More on that later.

I was also thinking about Janet’s post last week about reviews, and about various things I’ve been seeing around on-line concerning yet more thinly-veiled misogyny masquerading as high-brow readership (Ew! Romance! Only old ladies and stupid people read those!). (for example, see this great post on AAR, Top Ten Cliches About Romance Novels I Never Want To Hear Again). I’ve been reading and writing romance for a long time, and bad reviews and snarky comments mostly roll off me by now (no time for them–deadlines and all that), but they still can piss me off when I take time to think about it (so I try not to).

One of the books I was reading this weekend was Tina Fey’s Bossypants, and she had this to say, which struck me as great advice for women no matter what artistic or business endeavor we’re pursuing. (Sorry for the long excerpt, but she says it way better than I could!):

“…whenever someone says to me “Jerry Lewis says women aren’t funny,” or “Christopher Hitchens says women aren’t funny,” or “Rick Fenderman says women aren’t funny…Do you have anything to say to that?”

Yes. We don’t f****** care if you like it.

I don’t say it out loud, of course, because Jerry Lewis is a great philanthropist, Hitchens is very sick, and the third guy I made up.

Unless one of those men is my boss, which none of them is, it’s irrelevant. My hat goes off to them. It is an impressively arrogant move to conclude that just because you don’t like something, it is empirically not good. I don’t like Chinese food, but I don’t write articles to prove it doesn’t exist.

So my unsolicited advice to women in the workplace is this. When faced with sexism or ageism or lookism or even really aggressive Buddhism, ask yourself the following question: “Is this person between me and what I want to do?” If the answer is no, ignore it and move on. Your energy is better used doing your work and outpacing people that way. Then, when you’re in charge, don’t hire the people who were jerky to you.

If the answer is yes, you have a more difficult road ahead of you. I suggest you model your strategy after the old Sesame Street piece “Over! Under! Through!” (If you’re under forty you might not remember this film. It taught the concepts of “over” “under” and “through” by filming toddlers crawling around an abandoned construction site. They don’t show it anymore because someone has since realized that’s nuts)…

Again, don’t waste your energy trying to educate or change opinions. Go “Over! Under! Through!” and opinions will change organically when you’re the boss. Or they won’t. Who cares? Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.”

So yeah, this book is hilarious and you should totally read it (though how can someone not like Chinese food??). Also she’s right, and that is now my new motto. Over Under Through. (Plus a cynical laugh and knowing look when someone tries to disparage romance fiction seems to work wonders)

What have you been doing with your time this week?? What is your strategy for dealing with annoying people?