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Author Archives: Janet Mullany

The 50′ Pink Rabbit of the Regency

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Just for fun and procrastination I googled ten basic plots and came up with some weird weird stuff as you might expect. So I thought I’d come up with my own. Please feel free to add your own:

  • Hero[ine] leaves home and becomes involved with 50′ high pink rabbit cult.
  • 50′ pink rabbit arrives in town.
  • H/H want each other but physical object such as 50′ pink rabbit prevent their union.
  • H/H both want the 50′  pink rabbit, possessed of title and immeasurable wealth, but not each other.
  • The 50′ pink rabbit runs a spy ring and recruits H/H who become fierce competitors.
  • The 50′ pink rabbit writes a book called A Lot of Shades of Pink that becomes an immediate bestseller despite a rabbit’s typically incompetent grasp of grammar or basic math.
  • The 50′ pink rabbit receives movie deals and product endorsements and H/H plot its downfall.
  • The 50′ pink rabbit inherits a charming but run down B&B in a small town and hires H/H’s respective remodeling/interior design companies (note: excellent for Hero/Hero books)
  • H/H start new job as assistant to the 50′ Billionaire Pink Rabbit who mercilessly sexually harasses them and chews through their power cords.
  • 50′ pink rabbit invites H/H to secret club where he/she/they are forced to wear rabbit costumes and eat carrots.
  • Renegade government agents H/H capture 50′ pink rabbit that is a threat to national security.
  • H/H rescue 50′ pink rabbit imprisoned by Pentagon for secret testing.
  • The 50′ pink rabbit secretly gives birth to a litter of 10 blind 6′ babies.

More, please!

Posted in Frivolity | Tagged | 4 Replies

O say did you know

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Today’s the day in 1814 upon which poet Francis Scott Keyes composed The Star Spangled Banner which was adopted as our national anthem in 1931. He was inspired by witnessing the end of the bombardment of Fort McHenry during the War of 1812, where the British retreated after shelling the fort for over 24 hours, and, so the legend goes, as the smoke cleared, Keyes viewed the flag still in place.

Huzzah!

Keyes was visiting the British flagship the Tonnant, to negotiate for the release of one Dr. William Beanes who had been captured when the British invaded Washington. Letters from wounded British officers praising Beanes persuaded the British to release him, but they kept Keyes and his companions aboard ship, fearing they knew too much about the proposed invasion of Baltimore. Keyes, inspired, scribbled his poem on a scrap of paper and thus a legend was born.

Except … you must have noticed the words don’t quite fit. It’s difficult to sing, requiring you to squeak up tosome fairly high notes (most people have a range of about an octave and this requires a range of about an octave and a half). Keyes didn’t write the tune; instead he suggested that it should be sung to the tune of a 1776 drinking song called To Anacreon in Heaven, the theme song of the Anacreontic Society, a London drinking club. Anacreon, a 6th century BC poet, wrote extensively about women and wine. You can see more about the club and the text of the song at ColonialMusic.

I looked around for a version of the original on youtube and came up with this, which sounds historically correct tho there is no picture, the subtitles are odd and it sounds as though someone is splintering small pieces of wood during the recording (but don’t let that put you off). The song had a history of being recycled on this side of the Atlantic, with two earlier versions, Adams and Liberty–the Boston Patriotic Song and Jefferson and Liberty. It was a favorite of Keyes himself, who’d written another version in 1805, When the Warrior Returns, a tribute to Stephen Decatur.

If you’re in Baltimore or plan to visit, check out the Flag House (where the original star spangled banner that survived the battle was made) and Fort McHenry.

Also in a couple of weeks there’s a bombardment of books and authors at the Baltimore Book Festival takes place and I’m on various panels and reading on Friday afternoon/evening. More about that later.

What’s your favorite legend or reality of American history?

 

Posted in Research | Tagged , , , | 5 Replies

Top Ten Reasons to buy Hidden Paradise

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I’m absolutely the worst self promoter in the world because Hidden Paradise has now been available on amazon for two days and I somehow missed my own release date (which for the rest of the world may be September 25 or October 1). So today it’s all about the book. First, here’s the booktrailer in which I make my debut as a porn voiceover star:

This was made on iMovie which comes with the standard Mac bundle of software and it’s an extremely nifty little program. All sorts of visual effects and you can fade music in and out and I recorded  the voiceover with the puter’s inbuilt mic when the guys next door weren’t using their power tools.

You can read an exclusive excerpt on Heroes & Heartbreakers and learn more about my inspiration for the book at the RT Daily Blog.

And the Top Ten Reasons to buy the book:

10. There’s stuff about Jane Austen in it. Really. (As well as the sex.)
9. There’s a lot of stuff about paint analysis (well, it floats my boat).
8. People dress up in Regency clothes (and have sex).
7. They eat authentic Regency food (and have sex of no particular historical period).
6. There’s horseback riding and boxing (and … you know).
5. Also country dancing (and, you guessed it).
4. Glimpses of downstairs life among the team of hot footmen (no, not like that, though probably it should have been, but you do get that elsewhere).
3. It’s funny sometimes (even during the sex. Did we mention the sex yet? Oh yes, we did).
2. And sometimes it’s sad (by the way, did I tell you that…)
1. Because you know you want it real bad.

And now the contest: I’m giving away two signed copies (US only) if you enter with a coherent sentence about … just about anything, and I’ll pick names and announce on Sunday. So if you’re not planning to visit on Sunday, leave an emasculated version of your email, eg riskies at yahoodotcom so I can contact you. Usual restrictions apply.

Posted in Giveaways, Jane Austen, Risky Book Talk | Tagged , , | 11 Replies

All about the Baltimore Book Festival

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Baltimore is a strange, quirky sort of city. It’s the birthplace of Betsy Bonaparte who married Napoleon’s brother Jerome. Napoleon was not amused. Poor Betsy never got a crack at being a European bigwig though her extremely French ooh la la fashion sense appalled the fashionable set of Washington. I blogged about it here.

Baltimore brought us the Star Spangled Banner (which I blogged about very recently), Edgar Allen Poe, John Waters, the endearment hon (pronounced in the very odd regional accent), The Wire, and many other strange and wonderful things. And every year it brings the Baltimore Book Festival and I’ll be talking and reading there tomorrow on the Maryland Romance Writers’ Stage. It’s a huge three-day event which takes place in the Mount Vernon district. Lots and lots of books, beer, writers, kids’ activities, readings, food, and many good things.

I’ll be on panels talking about vamps, erotic romance, and keeping the history in historical fiction. We have some terrific guests including local writers like Stephanie Draven, Laura Kaye, and Christie Kelley. My out of town friend Miranda Neville will be there with me tomorrow and my other buddy Pam Rosenthal will talk on Saturday evening. We’ll all read from our books which you’ll be able to buy on the spot courtesy of Ukazoo Books (Baltimore is also rich in indy book stores).

There will also be drawings and giveaways and a bunch of us who are talking about vampires on Friday are doing a gift basket that has various treasures packed into a True Blood lunch bag (I think it would put me off my lunch, but there you go)–books, chocolate, jewelry, and one of my Austen mugs. I hate being involved in chocolate-heavy events. I just know I’m going to absent mindedly eat it.

So if you’re in spitting distance of Charm City, please visit the Baltimore Book Festival. You’ll have a lot of fun.

If you had to plan a book festival, who would you invite?

 

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