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Category: Former Riskies

First off, we’re all pretending that in the Regency I am Lady Carolyn Jewel. A bit of a bluestocking who sometimes (allright, often) speaks before sufficient thought. Also that the Duke of Hunkdom is secretly in love with me yet valiantly battling his emotions on account of his broken heart from three years ago. He looks like this:

The Duke of Hunkdom

Also in love with me is the Crown Prince of SomeCountryOrOtheria. He too, is battling his emotions on account of he hates his father but loves me.  The Prince looks like this (only more formal in public. In this picture he is thinking of Lady Carolyn, which I hope is obvious to everyone):

The Prince Loves Lady Carolyn

Right. So 21st century Carolyn got up at 4:15am, went to the gym, notebooked revisions, went to work and did NOT get a lunch break, picked up son from school, took him to math, dropped son at home, left immediately for a city 13 miles north through horrific traffic, arrived at a bookstore listened to some writers read, read something herself, yakked about some stuff, drove home and is now blogging. I have revisions to do but I am brain dead.


And now for something completely different.

Maybe you guys already know about this site, but I didn’t: Regency England.  Good stuff there.


Question for you to answer

Who are you in Regency England? 

Or, alternatively, who wins Lady Carolyn’s heart and does anyone buy her chocolate?

Posted in Former Riskies | Tagged | 9 Replies

Lord Byron, 1788 to 1824. The man died 187 years ago. If I go to Google and search on Bryon, just the man’s title, nearly all the hits are about him. Here’s a link: search for Byron Note, if you will, that ALL the images that show up on this search result are, in fact, of Lord Byron. If you click on the images link, you’ll see that Lord Byron is STILL the predominant Byron image with some posers in there. (Who do they think they are?)

That’s a powerful name. For us in the English speaking world that’s something.

Since April is National Poetry Month, here’s a little Bryon, first the familiar, then something perhaps a little less familiar.

 

She walks in beauty, like the night
   Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that’s best of dark and bright
   Meet in her aspect and her eyes;
Thus mellowed to that tender light
   Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,
   Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
   Or softly lightens o’er her face;
Where thoughts serenely sweet express,
   How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,
   So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
   But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
   A heart whose love is innocent!

The Destruction of Sennacherib

 Lord Byron
   The Assyrian came down like the wolf on the fold,
And his cohorts were gleaming in purple and gold;
And the sheen of their spears was like stars on the sea,
When the blue wave rolls nightly on deep Galilee.

   Like the leaves of the forest when Summer is green,
That host with their banners at sunset were seen:
Like the leaves of the forest when Autumn hath blown,
That host on the morrow lay withered and strown.

   For the Angel of Death spread his wings on the blast,
And breathed in the face of the foe as he passed;
And the eyes of the sleepers waxed deadly and chill,
And their hearts but once heaved, and for ever grew still!

   And there lay the steed with his nostril all wide,
But through it there rolled not the breath of his pride;
And the foam of his gasping lay white on the turf,
And cold as the spray of the rock-beating surf.

   And there lay the rider distorted and pale,
With the dew on his brow, and the rust on his mail:
And the tents were all silent, the banners alone,
The lances unlifted, the trumpet unblown.

   And the widows of Ashur are loud in their wail,
And the idols are broke in the temple of Baal;
And the might of the Gentile, unsmote by the sword,
Hath melted like snow in the glance of the Lord!

Sometimes it feels as if Byron is the only poet of the Regency, his legacy and wicked personal history looms so large. But of course there was that Wordsworth fellow who wrote a poem or two, and his sister Dorothy. Not to mention Keats and Shelly. But what about this one?

Perplexity: A Poem

Elizabeth Hands

Ye tender young virgins attend to my lay,
   My heart is divided in twain;
My Collin is beautiful, witty, and gay,
   And Damon’s a kind-hearted swain.

Whenever my lovely young Collin I meet,
   What pleasures arise in my breast;
The dear gentle swain looks so charming and sweet,
   I fancy I love him the best.

But when my dear Damon does to me complain,
   So tender, so loving and kind,
My bosom is softened to hear the fond swain,
   And Collin slips out of my mind.

Whenever my Damon repeats his soft tale,
   My heart overflows with delight;
But when my dear Collin appears in the vale,
   I languish away at the sight.

’Tis Collin alone shall possess my fond heart,
   Now Damon for ever adieu;
But can I? — I cannot from Damon thus part!
   He’s loved me so long, and so true.

My heart to my Damon I’ll instantly bind,
   And on him will fix all my care;
But, O should I be to my Collin unkind,
   He surely will die with despair.

How happy, how happy with Damon I’d been,
   If Collin I never had knew;
As happy with Collin, if I’d never seen
   My Damon, so tender and true.

 I particularly like this last poem because it works so well to explode the very prevalent notion we seem to have that women of the period were dis-passionate creatures who would NEVER have two lovers and be unable to so delightfully decide between them. And hint, all the while, of passion.

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The Announcement

My Regency Historical title from 2004, The Spare, is now available on Kindle, Kindle UK and Nook. It’s a little bit of a Gothic tale in that it has a castle and a ghost (or does it?) There’s also amnesia (not total amnesia) and a hot Navy captain and a little (grown up!) red-headed girl. Here’s the cover, which a friend of mine called an erotic watercolor and Disney Does Dirty. I’m going to do some cover research with this title by switching out the cover in a bit and seeing what happens to sales.

What do you think? Different, yes, which is good. But too different?

Regardless, my long Out of Print title is now available! Yay!!!

The Confession Portion of The Blog

My TBR.  OMG. And this is just the pile I can reach from my chair, in absolutely no order. There are more, but I’m not getting up to look.

  • Devil’s Own, Veronica Wolff
  • What I Did For  Duke, Julie Anne Long
  • Visions of Magic, Regan Hastings
  • Silver Borne, Patricia Briggs
  • The Lady Most Likely, Quinn et al
  • Lion’s Heat, Lora Leigh
  • How to Marry a Duke, Vicky Dreilling
  • Miss Madcap, Joan Smith
  • Ravished by a Highlander, Paula Quinn
  • Wise Man’s Fear, Patrick Rothfuss (loaned out hard copy, have eBook on iPad)
  • No Control, Shannon K. Butcher
  • Tall Tales and Wedding Veils, Janes Graves
  • No Regrets, Shannon K. Butcher
  • Hostage Zero, John Gilstrap
  • Dreamfever, Karen Marie Moning
  • Living Nightmare, Shannon K. Butcher
  • Luck of the Wolf, Susan K. Krinard
  • Wolfsbane, Patricia Briggs
  • Unveiled, Courtney Milan
  • The Mockingbirds, Daisy Whitney
  • Dreams of a Dark Warrior, Kresley Cole

And that doesn’t include eBooks, except for Rothfuss.

The pile is only going to get bigger and deeper as my deadline approaches because I can’t stop buying books.

What’s in your TBR (print or eBook)?

I am in deadline mode. Ack!!! :::arms failing::: Oh, hey, hold on while I go organize my soup cans and sort the vegetable bin.

While I do that, here’s some pictures from around Jewel Central. Also, this post is Regency related because I am writing a Regency. Oh, and also, I am using the exploding pencil AND the falling off doorknob in this book.

Regency Era Smut

You may recall that last week I mentioned a Regency-era tale called The Lustful Turk. I suppose it’s erotica. I had high hopes for this book going in. After all, it’s Regency-era smexiness. What could be better except maybe pictures, which the print version has?

On the whole I would rather troll Shakepeare for dirty puns. (I’ll be right over, Amanda.)

In Preview This Book on Amazon, the pictures looked nice and clear.  In the book? Not so much. I could tell the subject matter was racy, but in the print book, the pictures were too small and pixelated. What a disappointment, because there was some artistic merit in them.

The Text of The Turk

The text wasn’t a disappointment, but not in a good way. Early attempts to tell extremely racy stories (de Sade excluded since he could at least write his way out of a paper bag) were predictably bad since 1) the desire to write hot doesn’t necessarily coincide with a talent for such and 2) there was a fairly universal lack of elements we today consider necessary to an entertaining story. Things like plot, character development and something– some nugget of something– that readers can care about.

I don’t know for sure if this is something peculiar to men writing about sex but for pre-20th century raciness, the lack of story elements is the norm. More on that in a bit. Although, I’m pleased to say that this book did have a discernible plot. I’m not saying it’s a good one, but stuff happens!

Great Lines in Literature

However, plot points aside, The Lustful Turk is notable for what I consider one of the greatest lines of literature ever written:

“Seize the virgin!” repeated Ozman, ‘she will be only too honored and happy to escape the pollution of this blaspheming wine bibber.’ 

Imagine this Regency buck sitting at his club with pen and paper and writing his magnum opus between drinks and bad jokes. What should Ozman say, he probably wondered at this point. He wants his heroine to get kidnapped at her wedding and then nailed by the Lustful Turk, who is not Ozman, by the way. Yes, it’s quite a turning point and full of conflict. Will someone pop her cherry before the Turk gets his chance? Our erstwhile author is at least attempting to create tension. He has another drink and inspiration swells!

Rest assured, the Turk gets his virgin. Several of them actually.

In Which Carolyn Sighs. Many times.

The women are all horrified at being raped until the Turk convinces them they like it, and then hey! Turk-y baby I love you because you can get that big engine ready on a moment’s notice all night every night.

I was not convinced, I’m afraid.

It was authorial wishful thinking with a big dose of stupid ideas that need to die a horrible death. It’s a distasteful trope that lasted well into the 1980’s when Feminists saved all our asses by pointing out how absurd, destructive, hateful and just plain wrong it is to think a man can rape a woman and she’ll eventually like it. It’s pervasive in too much literature and lingers still.

In fact, you can probably yourself think of several literary books that include such false and damaging notions. And, of course, early Romances aren’t sometimes called Rapetastic for nothing. But, then, these women didn’t have a better example. That they often turned that trope on its head is something to celebrate as we also celebrate having moved past that in Romance.

There are all kinds of slurs, cliches and stereotypes. Everywhere you look. Religion? Yup. (An abbott demands sex in return for saving a womans’ life, otherwise, he leaves her to die) People who aren’t white? You betcha! (the whole damn book) The lower classes? But of course! (The heroine’s beautiful servant is badly beaten but the heroine? She is too white and tender and upper class.)

While the distasteful representation of female sexual agency is front and center there’s plenty more in the background. (Dear Anonymous Author: Worried much about women?) I get that he didn’t know any better, but did it have to take us 200 years before we did?

Meanwhile, Back in the Harem

Anyway, the story is told in epistolary fashion, with all the extreme awkwardness of that device that you could possibly imagine. No, imagine more. More. More….. Yes!

Now you’re close.

So more virgins get kidnapped and deflowered and the Turk is indeed very lustful. But he is also a nice guy. Because his very last conquest cuts off his penis and he is totally cool with that! He sends all his ex-virgin white girls home to their loving families.  To be fair, one of them is Greek or something.

There is also sequel bait in the form of the heroine’s baby. She’s knocked up at one point, and I think we never find out what happened to the baby. Or maybe we do. But I’m NOT reading through that again to find out.

Byron

Any connection with Byron is quite a stretch. He may be inextricably linked now with the revolution in Greece, but he’s not the only Englishman to go there or be aware of the politics of the revolution. Mentioning Greece in no way connects this book with Byron except for the modern reader who only knows, yeah, Byron — he went to Greece. I doubt very much the author was thinking of Bryon. He was thinking about whether the Turk should deflower another virgin.

Thoughts? Reactions? Opinions? Share in the comments.