You enter your library to find your mistress in flagrante with the butler. You…
a. Fire the butler and the mistress
b. Kill the butler
c. Ask the butler if he’ll dust the bookshelves when he’s finished
d. Shrug and invade another European country
You are discovered in flagrante with the season’s leading debutante. You…
a. Propose marriage to her
b. Offer to set her up as your mistress (you are tiring of her predecessor who will not shut up about the butler)
c. Offer to pay for the damage to the carpet
d. Shrug and pass her on to a lackey
Your preferred mount is…
a. A fiery mare only you can handle
b. A fiery stallion only you can handle
c. A friendly cob who goes to sleep when he stands still
d. Anything so long as it’s at the head of a victorious army
You find yourself snowed in at a remote country inn. To pass the time, you…
a. Flirt with the fascinating female guest who is traveling alone
b. Seduce all of the chambermaids and female guests, mainly serially
c. Settle down with a good book
d. Get out the maps and plan the next campaign
You hire a plain, respectable governess to educate your child. You…
a. Fall in love with her but respect her too much to seduce her
b. Seduce her and toss her out (the slut)
c. Discuss lesson plans with her
d. Kill her. She’s probably a spy
Your hobbies include…
a. Horse racing, gambling, drinking, womanizing
b. All of the above, but to excess
c. Collecting and cataloguing the botanical specimens on your estate
d. Conquering the known world
If your answers were mostly
a–Sorry, you’re far too typical a hero to attract a truly outstanding woman. You really need to re-think your lifestyle.
b—A hopeless rake. Women will swoon at your feet, fall into your bed, and generally harass you.
c—A lovable nerd. Sadly, you’ll never be more than a supporting character. Women, however, will find you strangely attractive, particularly after the rake has ruined and abandoned them.
d—You’re Napoleon and you can do whatever you want to.